Lightfoot doc: As clean, powerful as one of his songs

 

I walked out into the early evening air, with an achin’ in my heart, after seeing “Gordon Lightfoot: If You Could Read My Mind.” No pockets full of sand; just a rising melancholy over the injustice of age. He had the voice, the look, the musicianship, the poetry and the obsessive work ethic. Why don’t rare talents like that get a pass on aging?

Today, Lightfoot seems to be a spry, genial, intellectually nimble and musically au courant 80-year-old. He’s about as good as you can be at 80, lovingly tending his guitars and still performing, albeit with a wispy voice that’s just an echo of what we remember. Gord, we love you, Gord we miss you.

The tight, 88-minute documentary is playing through mid-June at the Hot Docs Ted Rogers Cinema and elsewhere across Canada. If my American family and friends are lucky, it will soon get some dates in the U.S.

The age-thing is, of course, just a selfish tantrum. Everyone ages, and the years take their toll on us all. Maybe we feel it more achingly when it was one so beautiful.

Writer/producer/directors Joan Tosoni and Martha Kehoe have packed so much into their film. Rare archival clips interspersed with interviews of Gord past and present, and an A-list of musical peers.

They barely have time to sample a few of the hundreds of artists who have covered Lightfoot’s songs. (The audience laughs hard when sparkly-jumpsuit Elvis, the complete antithesis of low-key country boy Gordon, is shown performing If You Could Read My Mind.

Another thing that stands out is the intensity of his work ethic. He was/is a perfectionist. He knew what he wanted from a young age and put himself in a position to achieve it, certainly because of his talent but no less because of the effort he put into making it seem effortless, organic. Every chord progression, every melody, every lyric had to be just right. He was demanding, as much on himself as anyone; as purposeful and active as a colony of ants, perpetually rearranging all the little pieces in pursuit of something bigger.

As it turns out, thoughtful, smart, insightful, poetic music rarely happens in a flash of inspiration. Except maybe in the case of The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald. All of Lightfoot’s preparation, talent and expertise came together over a few days to create that heart-wrenching ballad from the news headlines. Chord progressions, to melody, to lyrics. The details of that anecdote alone are worth the price of admission.Then there’s the Bob Dylan, Joni Mitchell, Johnnie Cash and countless other stories.

The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald was twice as long as the prescribed three-minute pop tunes of the day, but it was too good to be ignored and is still haunting today.

“Does anyone know where the love of God goes when the waves turn the minutes to hours … ”

Like Joni Mitchell, Lightfoot has filled notebooks with lyrics that are magic poetry. Most mortals could die content if they had written any one of those lines. To have been able to marry them with exactly the right music is beyond understanding. Even Lightfoot doesn’t seem to understand how he did it.

I leave the theatre both revering and mourning Gordon Lightfoot – missing the man who is still very much here, and wanting more. The filmmakers should feel proud. The audience doesn’t want their film to end, probably because we don’t want Gordon Lightfoot to end.

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Of Rainbow Railroads, Dragons, and Toronto the Good

“There’s nothing more powerful than a good story,” says Tyrion Lannister, saving his skin in the series finale of Game of Thrones with a speech about the power of stories to unite people. A bit self-serving, certainly, not just because it saved his life but more so because it was delivered by an actor, on behalf of writers and film producers, all of whom make their fortunes by telling stories. It was as if the brilliant actor Peter Dinklage looked into the camera and announced: “And now a message from George R.R. Martin and our friends at HBO.”

Still, none of that makes it any less true, and that’s something we need to remember more than ever in today’s toxic political environment. You can’t kill a story, and our stories define us, so let’s be thoughtful about the stories we are creating.

One had only to watch another piece of Sunday evening television for proof. 60 Minutes featured a segment on Toronto-based Rainbow Railroad, the organization that helps LGBTQ people in violently oppressive countries. These are people in mortal peril because of state-sanctioned, or state-perpetrated hateful violence against their own citizens.

The Rainbow Railroad helps them escape and start new lives in safe places. Seeing a gay man who feared for his life everyday in his home country walk down the street in Toronto’s Gay Village in awe that gay couples hold hands in public an no one notices or cares is like seeing one of those videos of small kids who get glasses or hearing aids and see their mom or hear her voice for the first time. It’s a joy to behold.

And so you have the story of Toronto the Good, a nickname that is sometimes used to poke fun at the earnestness and sincerity of today’s Toronto, and to ridicule its puritanical past. That’s a story that unites people, a story people will tell and retell, and ultimately a story that helps us define who we are.

Now, a final juxtaposition: the sour old man I met earlier Sunday at the dog-friendly beach in eastern Toronto. “I’ve lived in Canada 50 years but I won’t call myself a Canadian because of all these non-Europeans they’re letting in.”

Thank you. Please don’t call yourself Canadian, or Torontonian. Lazy, ignorant hatred has no home in Toronto the Good.

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Golf and Marriage: Don’t let your new husband use my clubs

In golf, as in marriage, a man’s reach should exceed his grasp.

 

About 30 years ago — the same year I took up marriage — I started playing golf. Today I shot a 122. For those unfamiliar with golf scoring but who know how to keep score in marriage, let me put it this way. Today I left every toilet seat up, forgot our anniversary and her birthday, dropped dirty underwear on the kitchen floor, left the cap off the toothpaste, forgot to pick up the kids, insulted my mother-in-law, drank milk from the carton. And on the par five ninth hole I slept with the nanny. I did everything wrong that can be done wrong.

My favourite golf joke:
Why do they call it “golf?”
I don’t know. Why do they call it “golf?”
Because “fuck” was already taken.

If my marital performance was still as bad as my golf game, I would have been smothered in my sleep decades ago. Unfortunately, mercy killing in golf is discouraged as ungentlemanly.

Golf and marriage follow a similar trajectory. It seems like a good idea at the time. You jump in. It’s much harder than you expected. But with practice and patience you get better. You deal with things as they come up. Impossible pin placements. Water and sand hazards. You learn from mistakes. You correct behaviours that lead to painful outcomes. Or you avoid them. You know you’re never going to hit that three-iron or make that flop shot, so you play it safe to avoid a snow man or a cold shoulder. Eventually your missteps become fewer.

A relevant side note:
A former colleague of mine (@bethteitell) recently wrote a brilliant piece for the Boston Globe about one of the issues couples start discussing later in life – what the surviving person needs to know when the other partner dies first. It can be read here.

The golfing corollary is to discuss what happens to your clubs when you die, which reminds me of another golf joke.

A husband and wife are lying awake in bed late at night, talking about the important things spouses talk about in the quiet darkness at the end of the day, like whether you put out the garbage, turned on the dishwasher or killed the spider in the laundry room, and removed its carcass.

Husband: If I die first, do you think you’ll remarry?
Wife: Oh, I don’t know. I don’t like to think about those things.
Husband: (After a contemplative pause) I think you should remarry. I’d hate to think of you living out your days alone.
Wife: OK, if you say so. Now go to sleep.
Husband: (Another contemplative pause) Do you think you’d live in this house?
Wife: What?
Husband: You and your new husband. Would you live in this house?
Wife: (a bit impatient) I don’t know. Sure. We’d live in this house.
Husband: (Contemplative pause) Would you sleep in this bed?
Wife: (chuckles and decides to play along) Yes. I like this bed. It’s comfortable. I’d keep this bed.
Husband: (pause) I guess that makes sense. OK, good night.
Wife: Good night, you moron.
Husband: (Pause) Just one other thing. Live in the house, sleep in this bed, but don’t let the new guy use my golf clubs. I really don’t want him to use my golf clubs.
Wife: (No pause.) Oh, don’t worry about that. He’s left-handed.

I like to think I have gotten better at marriage; become a better husband. But someone else has to make that call.
I know I have not become a better golfer. There is data. Scores don’t lie. Golf’s goal is to achieve the lowest score you can.

This fact tees up another interesting comparison between golf and marriage. Both are more enjoyable when you don’t keep score. So I try to learn from my mistakes, stay within myself, not swing too hard, savour the good shoots and let go of the bad ones. And all the while, enjoy the walk with a great companion.

One more golf joke:
Two golfers are ready to play on the 11th tee as a funeral procession motors passes by. The first player stops, removes his cap, and bows his head respectfully as the hearse passes.
“That was a really nice thing to do,” the second golfer says. “It’s good to see there is still some respect in the world.”
“Well, it’s only right,” the first golfer replies. “I was married to her for 35 years.

 

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